Sunday, December 18, 2005

Personal Discovery

I think I may have found the fatal flaw.  I can be one of the most patient people you will meet.  Rush hour traffic does not bother me.  Long lines at the store?  No problem.  I even offer my differing opinion to the complaining fusspots in line.  Children I have the most patience for.  The thing/people that I don't have patience with seem to be those in my romantic life.

Maybe it is a product of my results-driven career but I seem to have less and less time for the men in my life.  For me, I can pretty much tell from the start if something or someone is what I want to invest my time in.  So if an interest is expressed to me but not acted upon for 3 or 4 weeks, you can pretty much bet my interest has waned...probably to an irreversable nothing.  Basically, I would like an interest shown or at least my possible interest being "kept warm".  But I know that takes work.  Something that a lot of folks don't want to do. 

Maybe that is because to me it shows indecisiveness and a lack of passion.  A few of my girlfriends and I have had this conversation lately about the general lack of passion in the world. 

I don't think I ask for much.  I have waited this long for the right (or closest to right) guy to come along.  Personally, I would rather stay alone than know that the guy next to me has settled for me and I don't want to settle for him either.  Maybe the problem is that I make up my mind too early in the midst of things but I have learned not to put my feelings or time into something without some indication that I will get the same in return.  Personally, I could not sit on a decision for a month or two and then come back thinking things have not changed.  It doesn't work that way.  Am I wrong about that?  Maybe...but wrong works for me.